32 messages asking me to suck his dick. And there for a minute i thought i was desperate. ha!
Hahahaha
make that 40.
so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
just took my temp. 103. i wonder how tylenol and jager bombs are gonna mix
I should have to wear a sign around the rest of the day so everyone knows the shame I feel.
At one point you starting double fisting oreos in your mouth confused about how you got out of the car
SARAH B AND I ARE GOING TO GO HALFSIES AND BUY YOU A CAT. IS THAT OKAY. TO KEEP YOU COMPANY DURING THUNDERSTORMS SUCH AS THIS ONE. ITS BECAUSE WE LOVE YOU.
Well I found you sipping ron diaz out of a child's dinosaur cup while sticking your fingers in the guy's fish tank and watching the "pirahnas" snap at your finger and laughing
He ate me out like a beaver on a tree. I've never been so scared in my life
scratch that I can tell you where she is shes drunk on a beach somewhere being a penis slayer
Theres a point where you stop and say hey....as high as I am on LSD right now ...I`m just a man covered in paint
Dude that chick had a dog in her car. Like when she goes bar hoping so does roofus. He gaurds the car.
I've been watching porn with my cat lately. No shame
I made a joke about The Hemingway being a really boring sex position where you blandly describe all the action and then kill yourself after you orgasm. He stopped responding. I've GOT to stop talking to everyone like they're you.
My manager caught me going taking a nap in an empty room. Apparently she sleeps there too.
You where banging on the wall asking us where we hid the door...you then crawled under the deck thinking you'd be safe. I told you to eat the nachos before the party...I told you.....
Randomize
