He's on drugs...like drugs for horses.
Youll never guess who has to go to fucking planned parenthood because trojan cant make a fucking condom
Remember that one time i smeared period blood on your face?
I hate you
after a month anything with tits is on the radar
he squeezed my boobs like he didn't know what else to do with them, then turned down head...
told you he was gay.
id pay someone 5 dollars to tell me whos house im at right now. comfy couch though
I don't think my prof knows we've noticed her No Bra Fridays.
We didn't have a blender so we made the margaritas by running over a garbagebag full of ice with the car and then stirring it with a knife in a French-press coffee pot. CAN YOU SAY RESOURCEFUL?
Dude, they are shaking the RV, yell at them. It feels like i'm being rocked to sleep, I don't like it, I'm not a baby.
At least you have booty calls.
True. I just waste them though. I feel like I need to be told "there are people in this world who would give anything for just one and you have two." You know in that same tone your parents told you about the starving people in china
well in the interest of full disclosure I have been using a used kfc spork as a buttscratcher for a month
In that case, I'll try 2 find a date. But my options are AA friends or fuck buddies.
You said that we all need to "head out like a boner through sweatpants and get fucked." Jager night was a success.
You were so calm and collected as you strolled out the door with 40 mcdonalds cups in your arms. It was legendary.
HAVE BEEN SPEAKING IN RUSSIAN ACCENT FOR 5 HOURS
SHIRT GONE
Randomize
