Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
Uhhh...do I owe you any money? Or an apology? Or anything?
My sink just fell out of the wall. I can't deal with this right now
I don't have any food so I made a martini so I could eat the olives. Don't tell me I can't think outside the box.
1. They have gold fish races every wednesday. 2. They have a redbull vodka slushie. We need to visit this place.
1. My fish will beat your fish. 2. Were getting fucked up
Theres a midget tsa agent. Just an observation
You know how hard it is to play cool while not drowning and appreciating a pair of butts at the same time?
Trust me. Drunk Scrabble is not a good idea. Arguments over the legitimacy of the word "Pickle" break out, things are said, friendships are ruined. It's ugly.
And after we debated politics. My dream come true: naked, just got done having great sex with a hot mixed guy, talking about why social welfare programs are a bad idea
Just smoked a joint with the hottest patient. God I love night shifts.
You're about wine.
Yes, I'm like 90% wine at the moment
You ran into the tattoo shop screaming PIERCE MY TITIES
Cant leave im designed bacon maker you come here
You've got the chocolate, drugs and my pants. You hold all the cards...
Yesterday I febreezed my bed in between gentleman callers
Randomize
