I don't do stupid things anymore. I do stupid people.
Last night was an abortion. I might need a publicist.
im going to live freely with my legs opened and my heart closed
So how does it feel getting boo'd by the entire 5 guys restaurant
I mean you can't really blame him. He's named after whiskey and I don't get along with pants.
I think I'm just going to up-end a bottle of wine and look through pictures of what my life used to be.
Happy you have kids and I don't day!
Novelty of the week: Getting my lipstick back in an evidence bag
I'm tired of the topic. I sent him a pic of my vagina to change it.
What's the worst that could happen? I'm already broke and my leg's already broken
Turns out both me and my grandpa have a guilty pleasure for South American men.
So is it your turn now to pretend like dating someone else would stop us from fucking?
He also needs to focus on not being such a little bitch, but that's none of my business.
he tried to have the "are we in a relationship" chat last night. I stuck my fingers in my ears, yelled lalalalalala very loudly at him and told him I would stop having sex with him if he ever tried that conversation again. bad person, or just being a realist?
You’ve seen my tits of course he broke his wedding vows
Randomize
