Fuck Jersey, the house im in is so baller but this state just cannot win.
I'm not saying he's gay. Just that he prob knows what a dick tastes like
You ordered a "mcblizzard" and yelled @ the worker for false advertisement because she didn't flip your "mcblizzard" upsidedown. You wanted it free. I'd say mcdonalds daytime workers need to be trained in dealing with daytime drunks too. She didn't know what to do.
Hung over. Bed full of legos for some reason. Not getting up. Come build stuff with me.
Is it uncouth to have a themed intervention? I know how much you like Star Wars.
They had their heads out of the car singing the wrong words to the national anthem as we drove through traffic of people leaving the fireworks. AMURICA
I also love beards. The playoffs are like christmas for my vagina.
My radar detector detects ice cream trucks. I think it was made for stoners
I just had really awesome sex bent over the side of an air hockey table. That is all. Happy thanksgiving.
I woke up naked on his boat with a cowboy hat on with a boat cover over me... Thank you tequila!
Whenever I'm not in the mood and don't want to go to bed swampy, I just strategically suck him off during the second period intermission of the Cup playoffs and he leaves me alone and does the dishes. It's a win-win.
I'm glad your nude photos turned out "classy" but you cannot hang them in the living room.
Tbh you just need to fuck it out like I don't know another solution
Why does 10AM Spanish always turn into a discussion about my sex life?
She’s the kind of asshole whose face I want to put on a T-shirt just so I can go outside and burn it.
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