woke up rolled in a yoga mat listening to enya. I'm never going back to Oregon ever again.
I didn't even realize you were getting that drunk until bam!
is bam when I fell down the stairs or when I threw up standing at the bar?
well i did drunkenly flip his snowmobile going 90, so i can kind of see why hes mad
josh has a chalupa in his pocket if you're hungry.
help me choose which girl to send myself boning to my girlfriend to make her want to break up
which one looks the most like her?
So it turns out rose was the bear hunting girl. Fuck my life
None of those words made sense together.
Hey history final, how's it feel to be raped in the ass by my steel cock of ACADEMIC PERFECTION?
you are way too vulgar to be a girl
I look like a zombie and smell like a stripper. Its gonna be a good day.
they call him the transporter because he'll be your designated driver in exchange for sufficient weed or sex.\n
what about money
no - he has a code he lives by
I was stumbling so much, men walking behind us were shouting "don't hit the pole! don't hit the pole!" whenever I was near a telephone pole.
I walked in on him successfully eating chips and masturbating at the same time. I don't know whether I should be ashamed or proud.
I gotta say, I do way better with the ladies than I do the men. So if it turns out being gay is a choice, then I'm going to go ahead and choose it.
Seriously your house is like the underground railroad for unwanted gay kids
God this is like a meg Ryan movie without the restaurant orgasms
Are these your boobs on my camera?
Randomize
