Okay just took the preggers test..and im NOT! :)
awesome babe! drinks tonight!
Wait does the happy face mean yes? fuck.
I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
i convinced her that her period would come back if we did it doggy style
I'm picking out a half way decent top so if I get arrested I'll have a respectable mug shot photo. Always be prepared.
we literally spent four hours convincing you that all 5 of your toes were there. no more everclear on a tuesday.
I told him I'd rather have sex with his father last night. I'll admit now that I was drunk.
this islike a room full of reasons why i should be in prison
They thought "watering it down" meant adding more vodka
that ring i bought was worth the 6 bucks. wore it to the bar, told some girl i was recently divorced and wasnt ready to take it off. just got laid. THRICE.
I'm alone drinking at the bar and the titanic theme song is on. This won't end well.
Lets get real here, ive seen your moms breasts multiple times
Dude. Yeah. This is a game changer. I feel dirty and possibly pregnant and it hasn't happened yet.
We all just did coke and we're coloring so if you're sober its pointless for you to come over here
I don't give a shit if she's homeless, if you're gunna live outside el pollo loco and act like a bitch I'm squirting you with my water bottle
These cutoffs are too tight but my ass looks like Freedom
Randomize
