And now I'm afraid that I'm a pornographic eater.
Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
The kid in front of me is videochatting and typing to his gf. I should make poop/sex faces over his shoulder, right?
im gonna call it quits for tonight... I am so drunk I dont even have the motor skills to masturbate
I don't know why people felt they couldn't use the toilet with me passed out in the tub. I shut the curtain. It was like being in another room.
Did you write your name in the dust on our toilet tank?
What is the appropriate way to inform him that I am TOTALLY down for break up sex?
Just because its your birthday does not mean u can play quarters by dropping quarters into cups to make me drink.
He spent 6 hours at the ER after crashing a motorcycle and still came to the bar, Ofcourse I went home with him. He's my hero.
His wife found out about our affair the same day he got fired for it.
The drunk mom in a firefighter hat just told her to leave.
why is there a wheelchair in the hall and why does it look like we banged in it?
Note to self:A blacklight toga party at a frat house is a bad idea. Some things cannot be unseen
I'm only fucking women born in the 90s this summer
He calculated like a serious conversion in his head the other day and got a crazy number and I was like damn that’s hot please proceed to take your clothes off.
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