There are 3 speedbumps now up. Think you can manage the urge to piss on them?
Aw shit! That's like putting me a in a room full of Captiain Crunch Donuts and Jasper Hale and not letting me put my mouth on either.
She made a list of the things each of us had done wrong and assigned a point system. Guess who came out the loser?
I drank gravy. I actually drank gravy. This is heaven.
I'm drinking whiskey outta the bottle trying to earn the trust of some ducks in the yard
maybe almost giving yourself a concussion counter acts a hangover
We had sex in the bathroom. Then he told me I could watch him pee.
There's a certain level of slut that i can handle.... I think she just broke that scale
haha she has always seemed a little off. when i met her i was told she was the queen slut. and she had a crown on at the time. it seemed appropriate.
Last I saw him was around 10 this morning. He was passed out on the porch with his head under the barbeque cover and there were cups of orange juice around him as well as loose tobacco spread everywhere. Good luck getting a hold of him.
At the bar, some guy bumped into you and you screamed "hey, don't touch what you can't afford sunshine!"
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
You used a fucking bud light like as lube last night. I'd get a UTI test like stat.
I wonder how long it will take her to realize that I peed in her night stand.
We fucked on the roof... like that has to mean something
If you were to to ask if I just hid 4 shooters or Jameson it my bra and panties the anwer would be yes, yes I did
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