on a scale of 1-10how much freaking out is acceptable if you just found a (possibly used) cock ring in the head board that your parents gave you?
Going abroad, it was like my vagina was in a candy store... a sweet sweet british candy store
double majoring has taught me only that psych majors are sluttier than govt majors
i think i had to give the cab driver my id to get home last night because i couldnt talk.
Next time we throw a party together I would appreciate it if you didn't try to get my friends to hook up with friends of yours you know have herpes
She's just so happy...and so naked.
And drunk me decided to play keep away with sober me's dignity
Technically my penis started a fight tonight
How high are you?
I feel like breakfast can just fly into my mouth
I am so excited I do not know how I will sleep.
It's like the Christmas morning of dicks
He would come to class in wrapped in nothing but a pink towel
I'm finally in my bed, my pants are off, and there's no pee on my carpet this is the best life has been all day
It's like those toothpaste commercials where 4 out of 5 dentists would recommend your vagina
Girls - I think I have a problem with stealing random shit when I'm drunk.
HIGH AS FUCK. JUST WATCHED THE TRIPPIEST VIDEO EVER. IM NOT SCARED OF PANDAS. I GOTTA GO. TRIPPIN AGAIN
Randomize
