He belongs with you like a mcdonalds playground belongs in Chernobyl
I cant video chat with you tonight, my parents are home
r u implying that im some kind of v-chat prostitution whore?
she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
Can someone please explain to me how I got rugburn on my tits?
I wish scraping a resin bowl could be considered cleaning.
Bought two parrots for us. I'm keeping them at the Bellagio.
I accidently showed a girl my balls already today. Made me think of you.
He won't let me go to the bars unless I can manage to get flip flops on.
Sounds like he's doing this for your own good...
Besides. I don't even really like sex because it feels great. I like it because for thirty minutes I own that guys ass.
I can always see lesbian subplot. It's my hero ability.
Are we at that point yet where I can just say "I want you to sit on my face"? If not, want to go out for "drinks"?
I don't know what to do with my life other than going on Reddit and watching porn.
I think I swiped left on my soulmate
Im covered in coffee vomit and urine and none of which are mine
Maybe life is about finding the person you DO want to cuddle with after they rail you like a porn star
Randomize
