He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
The only reason you're wearing underwear tonight is cause you have a family dinner before
Boobs. All I remember is boobs.
why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
I couldn't even finish, she was lounder and more annoying than DJ Khaled
Whenever someone from high school gets pregnant or has a pregnancy scare my self esteem grows a good 5 points
What's the appropriateness of putting a 50 cent lyric in my gmas eulogy?
I need to stop drinking. Side note- we have a party bus tonight. So the drinking will have to end after that
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK FUCKABLE IN AN ALL NEON SPANDEX JUMPSUIT?
NOLA update. Went to Corey Smith at the house of blues last night. Drank PBR and took lots of shots of Jack. Too drunk, cabbed it to the hotel and fell asleep while having sex. Not my finest moment. Now I'm in court. I can't wait to be your attorney.
Yes... I'll kill two birds with one crazy ecstacy filled night.
I have alotted at least an hour for ugly crying.
Self care is breaking into nasa and launching yourself directly into the fucking void
After a beer I realize now I may have shared too much about my obsession with ghosts with my therapist this morning.
I mean seriously with your cock and my tits combined we could rule the world. Pinky and the brain style
Randomize
