Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
i messed up with two guys last night...one i pranked and left the phone on..the other one i went crazy on trying to be his girlfriend after four jagermeister shots...
Last night was def like the makeout party episode of full house
Is it wrong that I didn't stop masterbating when the credit card company called?
did you answer or finish?
both
I think i can make this amish girl legitimately hot.
i like being sick. whatever the doctor gave me is awesone. the walls are waving at me. i never want to get better.
In other more interesting news I'm going to arrange a surprise orgy. You in?
also dude totally apologize for the whole drunken "want something in my mouth" text
Just watched a girl fall down the stair and be to drunk to get up. The only stair in the bar. It's like watching a turtle on it's back.
We may not see eye-to-eye on much, but I'm definitely willing to let you see eye-to-vagina again.
We fucked, she finished, high fived me, the pulled a celebratory pack of gushers out of her purse for each of us. I'm going to marry your sister dude.
i feel sensations at the ends of my beard. Either I am super high. Or my face has accepted my beard and I completed my transformation to Mecca
I wanna borrow his axe at this point and cut my head open just to relieve some pressure
it was the kind of sex that I don't even know how my hair extentions are still in
I was just in the bathroom and some guy yelled all hail the king... i cant go anywhere without getting recognized anymore.
Randomize
