He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
You don't have to be drunk! I've licked your asshole before
Correct me if I'm wrong, but I did not stop moving last night. If tequila gives me that extra push to have an active lifestyle, so be it.
You chanted SOFA PIZZA all night then we woke up to find about ten slices under the cushions where you were sleeping....
No but the chipped one is crooked now. Clearly I didn't use my hands to break my fall. I used my face
No, that was the night I helicoptered my dick to oncoming traffic. Im talking about the night I ran naked down the street.
Is everyone touching their nose at me a sign that I should stop snorting vicodin off my phone in the bathroom at school?
He left his boxers here. Can I keep them and make a shrine or would that be creepy?
btw my frat has a search out for you. the "girl who threw up in the middle of the party" but it was on some fat girls. so thank you.
I told my boss that I'm in a slutty stage of my life right now and the chef overheard and slipped me his number. I might get laid tonight
Remember when I made fun of you when you ran out of toilet paper on your brother's birthday and had to use coffee filters? Guess what happened today
Btw, the reason I have a black eye is bc I needed to puke so hard yesterday morning; I whipped up the toilet seat so fast that I railed myself in the face. Then spent the rest of the day more carefully puking. Kind of why I'm not in the mood for drinking.
there is a tent in the living room. its a vip tent room. i want in.
is it fun? or sober?
I resent the implication of a jizz addiction
Randomize
