so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
dude i dont realllllly have to fuck her do i? its just a mess down there and i think im gonna cry
There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
I have to collect my sorority sisters from greek row... I hate how being dd is a night and morning job
At the airport and im So hungover. Think anyone will help if I put a note on me reading "flying to Boston, please wake me as we board" and then passing back out?
You know were out to late when I call my hook up at 8:08pm and 8:08am in the same night.
I tried to tell him I love him but it came out something like "We're both fucked up and it works."
Is it 3pm? Or am I losing my mind because it's pickled in vodka and diet coke?
he literally referred to his penis as the alaskan bull worm from spongebob. when can we get married
I just sent an "I'm sorry I forged a prescription in your name" email. It was one of the more awkward things I've done this week.
I just want to meet a nice normal guy that doesn't want me to taze him while we have sex. . . . .is that too much to ask for?
He tried to grab your ass, but he grabbed my hand cause I grabbed your ass first. I saved your ass..literally. Your welcome.
I think I may have just hit a new slutty low! ..... Just purchased the Costco pack of condoms... $9.99/48 pack = amazing deal! The judgement when I bust out the value pack = priceless!!!
Hahaha wearing a fake moustache in public was the best idea i ever had
I just used a bag of jelly beans as an arm weight...I'm not sure what to think of myself
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