So I'm sober and underage, being hit on by a groom-to-be with braces...is it a bad thing that I'm enjoying it?
Walking by Farrand Field is better than a porno right now.
you have a cum towel under your bed, you're the definition of single
Bring it all. We will have a potluck of drugs. It will be magical.
Did someone do a keg stand in my bathtub?
judging from the lines on my body they wheeled me back in a shopping cart
You haven't had the true md experience until you've had your crotch grabbed by a drunk stripper with a snaggle tooth in front of your coworkers.
Yeah. I mean it wasn't that awkward. I just made conversation like there was absolutely no lack of pants.
We are all yelling at the cat at our apt in nothing but our underwear. How do you think it's going.
If he doesn't get here soon I'm taking off my thong and eating his dinner.
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
Anyone who does not consider cereal and wine as a balanced breakfast needs to leave immediately.
Every text my dad sends me is an AA mantra. Might be time to take a look at my life.
I remember turning to Jon after doing a line of coke and saying "I was a Girl Scout"
Ok. After that I think I'm going to drag queen jello wrestling if you would care to join.
Randomize
