Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
we went to the store to buy cookie dough and conditionally went straight towards the booze
Drunk lesbians having an argument about their realationship isn't as hot as I imagined.....
we made out inside of a kiddie slide for about 20 mins. it was the sexiest, most suffocating experience I've ever had
bro im too drunk for your spanish code words. did you fuck her or not.
just lying in bed drinking beer with a straw waiting for motivation. why?
WHO INVENTED HANGOVERS WHERE ARE MY CLOTHES
Hey my vagina is like a company. Everyone has an equal opportunity....
I just realized why I have little cuts all over my fingers. There was a broken pint glass in my purse last night.
My dad made a joke about you sending me strippers for valentine's day so clearly everything here is normal
Just realized I'm still chewing the same gum post blow job. This Stride shit really has everlasting flavor. They should totally have an ad campaign based on blow jobs.
If your gig isn't over in 30 minutes I am coming on that stage to come on your dick.
Ice cream and condoms, solid grocery store trip
Today I learned I and my bar naps were the subject of a bar meeting.
he sent a dick pic to my best friends phone for me cause mine died lol pretty sure he was regretting that night outta town.
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