I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
She uses empty wine bottles as book ends. 2 on each side. At least 8 shelves.
So apparently I ran down the hall to another party and started handing out uncooked spaghetti to strangers. You'd be surprised how many drunk people will eat raw noodles.
i don't know how the hand towel got involved, but i peed all over it
Tempting. But I already used the alcohol poisoning excuse at work this month. No way he would believe it a second time...
I can'nr wwn explain this nihght . So amnt dixks. Shitttttt.
And then he posed under the bed and said, "you should draw me like one of your french girls." Why do they keep giving this kid drugs?
So I woke up with a terribly bandaged finger an then discovered a pot of bloody onions on the stove.....who the fuck decided it was a good idea for me to try and cook
I'm like a freaking volcano of life and sexual frustrations
Oh I'm sorry does your girlfriend send you better pictures of things in her ass? No? Didn't think so. Remember that the next time you wanna complain how I don't make the first move enough.
I think it's getting serious, we started a jigsaw puzzle together.
I fell out of the car while it was moving then got puked on then puked and cried about then got back in the car and puked out the window when we started moving again
You know the sex was rough when you wake up with a chipped tooth. I have no regrets
Why do I always have at least 8 men with whom I am conducting some sort of poorly planned love experiment?
All I know is when I asked you how many fingers I was holding up, you said "Hippo"
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