It looked like if robin williams had a vagina
Just tried calling my phone on my phone because i thought i lost my phone.
if it were possible I'd exchange my vagina for a diff one on the black market.
if I end up fighting someone to save $15 on a toaster oven then something went wrong earlier in life
He just used my bikini trimmer to give himself a fumanchu. And I still plan on having sex with him tonight. This has to be what true love feels like.
Alas, very true. I'll sell some of my eggs and give you like 10%
And with my 90% I'll get a scooter with a sidecar. And a pony. Also with sidecar.
Thats stupid. Your future is a life of less pay for the same work. Free drinks is how capitalism reimburses women for its inequality. & youre not even taking it!
It hits you later. Like when you wake up on the floor under a puzzle later.
I had to talk to the cops at my front door in a bathrobe, with the buttplug still in.
Does this mean I don't have to apologize for launching about 20 bead necklaces at you from the balcony?
I woke up and found a stick of butter in my pocket. There's no butter in the house so I don't know who's it is. Using it to make cookies.
Is it inappropriate to be Drs. Willy Fister and Jess Hewill as a couples costume for Halloween?
Oh we're gynecologists
It's 1pm, she's in the shower, I don't have the guts tell her I wasn't her blind date. Someone got stood up.
I am praying to every god I can that he drank so much that he won't even remember me
I noticed it at one point and thought do I really wanna bang the guy with the phone holster .....of course I do
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