so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
I almost didn't recognize her with a shirt on.
Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
Tiger Woods should have just walked in, gave everyone a high five, and left.
I'd love to come and give you a massage, but we already duck taped my keys to the ceiling...
Today is definitely a "stand over the toilet and pee through the opening at the bottom of my boxers" kind of day.
I guess the silver lining is that having a big dick really comes in handy when you're hungover.
It's a mixed blessing.
After I finished inserting the catheter he said he thought my name was familiar. Didn't have the nerve to tell him he was my fifth grade teacher.
when I said energy drinks I meant cocaine
Turns out he's old enough to be my dad. I'm so excited. I've never had a sugar daddy before. What should I ask for first!? Want anything?
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
The highlight was when a stranger was nose to nose with you threatening to kick ur ass, and you said "Is that your real face? Stopped him dead.
I gave the bike taxi guy a blowjob because I didn't have any cash. College.
My dick has a subreddit
I'm so cold without your freakishly high body temperature
that's the equivalent to a normal girlfriends. 'I miss you' btw
My weirdest encounter with a stranger though was when for some reason they just gave me a box of unopened socks. Needless to say, I never used them.
Randomize
