No, you can still breathe under the balls.
5 am is for sleeping. Or getting railed on by a stranger. But never for fundraising. Get real.
Dude I could put my dick between the gap in her teeth.. This is the last time we are hanging out with Kentucky girls
Been at work for four hours and just discovered the chairs in my office double as a napping surface. Most productive thing I've done all day
I thought 4 percs were too many but I'm dumping Gogurt on apple pie and taking giant bong rips. This feels right.
You're like my zumba instructor for alcoholism right now
i told her i loved her afterwards and she said "i know," kissed me, and got up to start making breakfast.
dude, she han solo'd you. keep her.
He said the pain stops when I get my shit together and stop being a drugged out alcoholic mess. Could have just said no.
I should become her mentor. Get her life back together for her
You mean sponsor?
I need an inhaler full of pot for all of this breathless rage.
The fake number she gave me was for Pappa John's. Now I have a large pepperoni on the way.
i had to win in rock paper scissors, get called a fat whore, and make two dudes get in a fight so we could call next game on the table and you make zero cups. thanks asshole.
RESIST THE DICK
thats like telling me to resist drinking water. impossible.
Puking out the window is really hard when you're the one driving.
You might see me up a tree with a deranged look in my eye , just walk away at that point
Randomize
