I told him I'd give him a BJ if he admited Hanson was good.
dear roomies, would anyone wanna donate the booze they left in the fridge over break to the "your roomies snowed in and all alone" fund?
it'll be like the batcave but for manwhores
he just made me youtube cheetahs running and he thinks he is in a pool
Half my make-up was stuck to his thigh where I'd fallen asleep after the blowjob.
ur roommate just sent me a pic of us fucking. i'm not coming over anymore.
when someone at the bar asked you a question all you knew how to say was "chug-a-lug"
I couldn't tell you were laughing too hard
Dude I thought I set my hair on fire. I wasn't laughing I was screaming.
We're getting paid a considerable amount of money to send each other pictures of our dicks...
HIS BALLS ARE HEAVEN SENT FROM THE VELVET ANGLES.
The best part of Easter was watching all his colorblind cousins try to find the eggs.
Rob and I are cross faded and the only one taking care of us is a drunk person who's making us dance.
I kid you not. He let me in into his house, showed me the putt putt in his backyard. Offered to play me.
There comes a point where there's just condoms and old mcdonalds in your garbage can and you can't tell if you've won or lost.
You’re not his type
I’ve got blonde hair and great tits. I’m every man’s type
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