I wanna crawl in your skin and have dreams about Bobby Kennedy tonight.
He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
Its kinda awkward hearing him say the food taste like ass considering what he did last night.
My life has become a never ending game of 'illegal or just frowned upon?'
we've got reservations. ask for the eat a bag of dicks table
When he came downstairs he looked at me like I was attempting to rob his house.
Did you reintroduce yourself?
He threatened to call the cops.
"it's Wednesday" isn't a good enough excuse to take my debit card and use it for your own drunken needs. You owe me 250 bro
You kno how some people just need a "everything will be alright" pat on the back? I need an "everything will be alright" blowjob right now. Come over
Queso dip and pictures of Daniel's penis. It's like the last days of Rome over here.
Please tell me how the stripper got back to Sarah's from the trailer park
sidebar: i fucked your brother last night
My trash can accurately represents my weekend: Bojangles wrappers and magnums.
He said he didn't want to go down on me so I told him we were going to have an oral stalemate.
The hat, the beard, the hard posing - like who does he think he is?
A bag of dicks
That's dating life
It's Valentine's Day, I figure for sure we'll have sex today, right? Wrong. I tried unsuccessfully for like an hour to get him to fuck me. Now he's asleep and I'm on my way to join the public library.
Randomize
