i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
So I'm banging this nun...
Isn't that how all good stories start? I like it already...
Omg. Get me out of here. Someone is playing michelle branch.
He told me his condom was going to expire tomorrow and he needed to use it. I can't believe I fell for it.
To put it in a frame of reference with which you're familiar, it was like making out with a golden retriever.
We had sex and then he fed me pie. This is the best friends-with-benefits situation ever.
i just saw you make out with a girl with facial hair...just thought i would document that in case you forgot
He calls it "his noble steed" and i plan to ride it.
I wonder what acid is like for a blind person... Can we find this out?
Did you sleep with Connor? And who undressed me? There's a picture of two guys peeing out my bedroom window. What happened?
You need to braveheart it on Monday. Blue face paint and a loin cloth screaming freedom in your front yard.
His roommates came in and started a dance party in his room while we were having sex. He said it wasnt the first time.
I know everybody has skeletons in their closet but why are all of mine so slutty?
Yes ma'am.Im also looking at my collection of penis pictures in my email playing "who;s penis is that"?
it's a shower with the lights off kind of day
Randomize
