we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
yeah, i liked him til i heard he had a sac that could apparently smother my face.
If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
my one-armed grandma is doing the YMCA. you figure it out.
Numbies before the dentist, such a good idea.
The cops walked in to class and arrested 2 guys for possession.
That's okay, during storytime I would have to sit on my hands so I wouldn't touch everyone. Explains a lot...
i tried to climb in the window in the limo because i wanted the driver to take me to get noodles. ive reached a new level of fat kid
I specifically found a fat girl to lift me up on her shoulders.\n\nIt was glorious.
this mall makes me feel like I just rolled a 9 in jumanji and got the stampede card
I just blocked a guy on grindr for having a little dick. See? I do have standards.
I got propositioned while wearing the bottom half of a horse costume. It's like god is apologizing to me in the strangest of ways.
it's the amount of time you spend on preventing me from puking that really cements this friendship
I tried eating pop-rocks while giving him a bj, I honestly think I was more disappointed with the results than he was.
So my dad just asked, "did you leave without pants a lil bit ago?"
Randomize
