I have a masturbator in my 5th grade class. the teacher told me ever since they caught him humping the desk in 2nd grade, they haven't been able to control him. he's even on medication but he will just do it in class
Does my surprise involve the use of a safe word?
Probably.
I'm in.
I feel like I bought a front row ticket to watch her screw up her life
Drunk lesbians having an argument about their realationship isn't as hot as I imagined.....
It took him three days to realize his roommate had moved out.
He just got dropped off drinking a flask, sitting on the handlebars of a chinese delivery man's bike
Tonight's gonna be epic. Did he bring my noodles?
He's like the unplanned child of drunkenness
you were telling us about the time you had sex in an alley and he stopped, looked up and said 'it was a cul-de-sac' and went right back to what he was doing.
You know I'm dangerous when I have make-out withdrawals
Woke up naked on your sister's mattress lying next to a single slice of bread.
Now that it's over, I can finally say it and not feel bad,dude. Her mustache is better than yours.
For some reason she gave me a handjob. It was all very confusing
When God made him he put all his talent in his dick. What he lacks in brain, he makes up for in loin.
you asked how they got the microwave in the air. we had to explain three times that it was mounted there until you finally feel asleep
he would NOT stop making out with my stomach! creeeeeepy
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