is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
She stuck a Big Gulp bend-y straw up his ass to see if he could handle anal.
Ew, and?!
Well he couldn't and the deal was he had to drink something using it afterwards.
While my grandpa showed the family a slide show he accidentally included a topless photo of his new gf.
you started texting yourself and saying they were "divine messages from heaven" then you threw up on stacie's piano.
She's like the Michael Jordan of alcoholism
It's like I just got slapped in the face with the cock of nostalgia.
I was giving a campus tour, when a drunk senior came up behind me and shouted at the group, "If Jesus ain't your homeboy - get the fuck off this campus!" Looks like his religion course is paying off...
Just saw the german running around on campus. Thought of his small penis.
As you should.
I managed to get through my meeting without throwing up in someone else's office, so there's that for an accomplishment today.
It hurts to hear and I can smell shapes.
He said we were over, wrote my name on the condom he left in my car last night and said he'd always keep it in case I came back. It was kind of romantic
Tbh you just need to fuck it out like I don't know another solution
The man built me a fort. Of course he got laid.
i wish i could put you in a lil box, and keep you for when i need to be blown
there's still a lot i don't remember, like why my iphone's nailed to your wall
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