That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
letting you know, as a good neighbor, that when your windows open and your shade is up we can hear and see you dancing naked to money maker... nice boobs
I think its only fitting my first purchase with my student loan is a glass pipe? I think ill name it 'Subsidized'
You know, he picked a really shitty time to stop sleeping with me to pay attention to his girlfriend.
The two guys from next door helped him do a backflip. The ended up throwing him halfway through a ceiling tile. Don't worry, we fixed it with duct tape.
Babe when I told you that you needed to grow up I didn't mean get drunk and sponsor 8 African kids.
when you greet her, try not to lead with "this night will end with you on top of me". first impressions, bro.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
It was a fight. Me vs nature and drunkenness. And nature won. Big time.
Our drunk hook up was interrupted by the delivery guy. When he came back to my room we ate the gyros and went back to sex like we didn't take a lunch break.
I had sex with a boy who lives in a closet, that's like having sex with Harry Potter, right?
His PENIS is so fucking big that I always use caps, out of respect.
Profesor just winked at me. This class might be easier than I thought
when ur drunk laser tag is all fun n games. try it high and all of the aliens in the galaxy want you dead.
I want to disappear from this job like a fart in the wind.💨
Randomize
