dude i was like still drunk, taking pictures of her while she was naked and asleep and she woke up
haha what'd she say
i don't know man, something about us dating. but i never talked to her sober so i said i was making breakfast and snuck out of her house. close calls man WTF
and ill be dreaming of you. not in a creepy way, but in an inappropriate way
Fell into a man hole last night. I've been bleeding since 11pm. Got kicked out of the bar for being bloody.
The woman at the nail salon waxing my lip just showed me the strip with all the hair on it while smirking. Apparenltly 'you have a stache' can be communicated through a language barrier.
Meghan got a job at the bar. We're now morally obligated to drink. Is this what dreams are made of?
Update is I am officially king of Gettysburg. Tam and I are being threaded like royakt. In bought e ruined a drink
Yes. Be the home wrecker you've always dreamed of being.
I AM HANGING OUT WITH ADORABLE DOGS SURROUNDED BY NATURE. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND ALSO BYE CIVILIZATION AND PANTS.
Are you at a park?
It wasn't even dirty talking, it was more like the soothing gentle nonsense noises you make when you've spooked a horse.
I just remembered something. We made out last night, people cheered.
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
My thoughts mid terrible hookup: do people normally read a magazine right about now?
It was like Lady and the Tramp, but just tramp and the tramp. And instead of spaghetti and meatballs, we had whiskey and cups
I just used a bag of jelly beans as an arm weight...I'm not sure what to think of myself
Justin has passed out on the toilet in a locked stall. Stay tuned for pics.
Randomize
