Remember when you weren't going to be a shit show?
Sponge bath it is.
im giving 12 year olds life advice. this is probably illegal somewhere.
The mexican place next the the funeral home has dollar margaritas, our grandfather would want us to act on this... trust me i know.
I know I said I was done dating 22 year olds but it's not my fault all the guys my age gave up on life and got fat
You spent about half an hour trying to convince me that mesh condoms were a good idea.
just fucked two guys in less than 12 hours. i miss this part of being single.
and by single i mean slutty
well.. I tried flushing my sandals down the toilet
Who is he, asking me if im dtf without a question mark
...
I think we should get high on adderall and nair each other again for New years.
Just purchased ketchup, body wash, and lube. Hope you're ready for the post-memorial-day-cookout-shower-anal.
This storm betta not fuck with taco tuesday
I took her to the bar and boom. All of my past slump busters were there. Shes cool enough to know what that means and said she was afraid they'd eat her so we left.
With 4 extra seconds dedicated to the dong.
These kind of text worry me.
He dicked me, fed me creme brulee, and didn’t make a big deal out of me causing a flood to come outta my vagina
Marry him NOW
Randomize
