i was unsuccessful, further solidifying for me that girls should not masturbate.
Its not like he dircectly choose a cheeseburger over sex, it was more like I said seductively "I really appreciate this and I'm going to make it up to you anyway I can" and he replied "i want a bacon cheeseburger"
i guess he just knew i was going to sleep with him either way
Let's just say he looked at my vagina like it was a rubics cube.
I didnt realize til after I got out of her apartment and into the lobby that we lived in the same building.
Woke up this morning on my couch at 6am fully dressed including heels, holding half a corn dog. I called you last night when I was buying the corn dog from a street vendor, I think.
I am in love with you.
dude there is absolutely no room for a slide in our room
found a hand written recpiet for 'one doe fawn' on an open crate in my living room need help to find it
where the hell would u of bought a deer
i think the penis that was inside of me changed my life
While I faked being asleep, he literally prayed to God out loud, asking for forgiveness for losing his virginity before marriage.
When I blacked in, I was crying to my father at the swim-up bar that "I was going to win an Oscar." how do you THINK Mexico was?
I'm wearing a real bra and real shoes. I look like a fucking lady.
I or someone else dumped a lot of glitter into my boobs last night.
We were having sex but then he spanked me and i punched him but it was just a reflex i swear
He passed out with his shoes on 20 minutes till midnight, and I didn't have a sharpie so I took the cheese whiz and filled his exposed ass crack.
i just read a article called "Booze, Drugs, and Bipolar Disorder"... i think someone is writing the memoirs of my life
Randomize