So how come you never look me in the eyes anymore when we make love?
Also, I once came to the conclusion after this one boy, that her pleasure condoms are a college boys version of flowers
If I go there, please come with. It will accelerate the lesbian rumor but be totally worth it.
judging from the lines on my body they wheeled me back in a shopping cart
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
It felt as i were a pad of butter melting onto a piece of toast.
So my mom wants me to come swim with dolphins with my little sisters in October. I'm not sure how to tell her I saw a "when dolphins attack" special when I was rolling and am now terrified of them.
that's just what you get for learning massage techniques from gay porn
I kept resisting the urge to yell "2 for 2!" so they could hear me on the other side of the wall.
Oh, AND I met a ukulele teacher that I'd date. So there's that.
I need a new best friend. Someone who drinks like a fish, hooks up enough to raise eyebrows, and isn't afraid to admit that masturbation is the second best way to spend time. Someone like me! Help me put up posters.
Vodka for breakfast. With a side of Frankenberries. Don't judge me.
i just remember that i was on top of him and he wasnt contributing to the event much.. god i hope he wasnt asleap.
I want you to remember that you started masturbating in front of a car full of people. That drunk.
Best single mom victory - getting eaten out in my dodge caravan in the hospital parkade at midnight.Three words: screaming multiple orgasms.
Randomize
