i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
As long as they suck a good dick I don't care what fruit they have and where they have it
I convinced her last night that my actual nickname was "No Condom John"
it turns out jennifers body is not good to beat off to. yeah its megan fox but when she pukes up blood = goodbye boner
Umm you don't wanna know how many "I'm sorry for calling you last night" fb wallposts I just had to write...
I found a picture of my kindergarten class. Now you can see whose peer pressure I succumbed to.
thank you for tagging me in all my pictures as "skank" and yourself as "made by the hands of God"
Put cigar in mouth backwards. Plz remind to check for scar in morning, can't feel it now. Screwdrivers are like morphine.
It's such a good feeling to send those "I'm not in jail" texts on Sunday morning
I BIT YOU IN THE DINING ROOM. I bit you and you crunched
The only way to make beer can wizard staffs any better is to sew your own wizards robe and hat to go along with it. welcome to tuesday nights at my new apartment
I think I may have accidentally stepped in fire
Pretty sure I just became my mom's wingman
Thank you <3 he just looked at me, fist bumped me, and asked me what was on my titty....we may cut her off
I put a zucchini in my pussy for you
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