God dammit. Now I'm pissed at Arizona, while feeling bad for my poor, poor penis.
I got to see an enormous amount of vagina this morning.
Omg. Budweiser tramp-stamp sighting @ Wal-mart. Best tattoo EVAR.
this guy jus got head in a gas station bathroom from this fat chick with one leg
gross dude. was the guy blacked out drunk or something?
yeah and it only cost me 6 dollars
im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
He gave them shots of purell and called it "acid rain" jello shots. They took them.
I hate freshman.
from the looks of the bare footprints in the snow it looks like i was dancing in circles which explains the frozen puke
He kept surfacing with a delighted look on his face, guessing different types of food to try to figure out what makes my pussy taste so good.
What was the name of the cook I had sex with at Famous Dave's?
I am the kind of drunk to where i can still drive a golf cart
Can I just keep holy water in the night stand next to the vibrator?
I'm sorry I lead life with my vagina.
Sometimes I look at her and just start choking. She is that much of an evil entity.
I got the beer and the first aid kit. You get the tequila and burn cream. We should be set for the camping trip.
The minute he showed me his Mumford and sons tattoo is the minute i could literally feel my pussy dry up
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