You know, as long as there were ice cream breaks, I would totally eat chips for a living.
yea ive hooked up with like half those guys
and i've hooked up with the other half...when our powers combine, we are captain slutbag
when the lights went off, all i could see was the glowing of the camera light in the closet... i got the fuck out of there so fast.
I just withdrew $200 in ones. I think the teller knew what was up
How much would it be to rent out Gus Johnson so he can announce our flip cup games?
These pubs in Ireland act like hand jobs aren't the universal currency
I can't remember where my feet are. All I can see are colors, and all I can feel is terror. The lollipop was a bad idea.
I was like a damn cattle dog, I separated all the sheep, I can wing man for anyone on this campus.
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
Came so hard my ears popped. This lovely piece of news and pissin in my driveway brought to you by rum
Dougie got over his pride nerves. Found him dancing on a float wearing nothing but rainbow boxers.
he answered his phone during sex and left to go help that drama queen with her latest bullshit. I'm drinking all his vodka. it's asshole tax
VASECTOMY FOR THE WIN
Yeah. I fucked her boyfriend, she knows, and she still wants to keep dating him. That's love.
I should have known when she mixed malibu and V8. It smelled just like tanning oil and when she drank it she said "Oh well, not the first time."
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