I wish scraping a resin bowl could be considered cleaning.
Just got the orientation leader spot. For the first two days, I will be one of the best looking guys on campus. The freshman girls will be so disappointed they settled for me when everyone else comes back.
She was so wet my fingers were literally pruney when I got done with her
They fucked on my pong table last St. Patty's and broke it. I feel like I should be hiding my new one. Would hate for a tradition to form.
So another one of your girlfriends from middle school had a baby. Thank god you are gay, otherwise you would definitely be a dad by now.
I woke up and he was just feeling up my stomach. I felt like buddha and he was rubbing my belly for good luck. never again.
Don't come. It's not even a party it's a total sausage fest. Like 20 drunk dudes in a bedroom. We can still drink by ourselves though it'll be ok
Yes I slept with him, he was the only one not wearing a costume. Guys with costumes are just trying to impress you.
Dude, chad is laying across the room, violently, passionately, pornographicly eating something and I seriously think the 'some thing' is fighting back.
blowjobs from left handed girls are noticably better than from righties. these are the most important things I've learned this semester
I wanna just rip ass and see his reaction but i bet itd be better to shatter that illusion when hes drunk
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
Hey. Im sorry to bother you but I just watched the seinfield episode about faking an orgasm and it caused me to second guess myself. Were you satisfied?
Just remember, it's never too late to make a porno
I want to shoot him sideways (so he can still breathe) in the Adam's apple with my little crossbow.
Randomize
