Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
I'm going to pre plan my black out tonight. I think I'll set a change of clothes out on my bed and unplug the oven.
So squirting runs in the family.
It's a piss down the stairs of the hotel kind of night
Very excited! Vodka will be shot, dicks will be ridden, and memories made.
But I swear to god if I'm awkwardly there while you try to have sex with someone again I'm getting high with your dad
BING! You are now free to move about my panties. He just left for work.
Adults smoke weed in footie pajamas man. You just gotta accept me for who I am.
He may not be fully over his current wife yet. But wait until I show him my tits in his office at the end of the day tonight.
She said if her future children dont have blue eyes she wont love them
It's gotten to the point that I'm pretty sure I'm going to need to be legally drunk before I enter the voting booth this year.
Just cuz u chase vodka with sweet tea doesn't make it sweet tea vodka
Let's not forget that we had sex on the ground in public tonight.
scotch tastings during the week is a baaad idea. i woke up w no pants but wearing my winter coat
Neighbor just came over and asked if I had anything to clean blood out of carpet... it's definitely time to move.
Randomize