Whatever, you were 10 deep and there was a hot tub. No judgment.
i just won an entire level on word mole with the word 'clitoris'
A slipped finger up the butt isn't the end of the world
I hate nights where "I found my underwear" can be considered a victory.
I just found a bottle of gin in my vegetable crisper. Party is back on.
there's a barbecue in the shower. I'd like to know who got this to fit inside perfectly. impressive
It's not a good night until someone eats a bagel covered in face mask thinking it's cream cheese
You need to tell him your pregnant or we need to stop playing doubles beer-pong. My liver is begging you.
This girl came outta nowhere yelling HOLD MY DICKKKKKK!
Making a mobile stripper pole for the back of my truck memorial weekend. Is where dignity goes to die
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
I've officially slept through a hurricane, a tornado and had sex during an earthquake. I'm surviving.
Also, apparently I'm only coherent when I'm drunk sexting. And then I'm grammatically perfect and impressively eloquent.
so horny i almost want to text him..and then i remember the restraining order i have against him
Stacy was in the bathroom puking, so he peed out the window. We were eight stories up.
Randomize
