She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
boyfriend # 1 is in the bathroom and boyfriend # 2 is ringing the doorbell need back up this is not a drill i repeat this is not a drill
I can't wait to see you, I've been doing mouth stretches for the past 2 days
Because its an amazing idea and you're the only one I can think of that will allow a pirate threesome
i got shots of sambuca dumped on my head last night. my bag still smells like licorice. making me nauseous.
it is a nice little reminder of the bruins dominance. if Vancouver had won, it would somehow smell of maple syrup.
Its what happens when I drink whiskey in a sweater. It makes me feel mature and ponderful.
He was puking up tons. He aimed his face inside his coat. Not a drop in my car. Then he thanked me for the ride.
All I want is for every tall lanky young guy who is reading in a Starbucks to go balls deep in me. That's all.
I don't remember much and some girl almost convinced me to jump off the bridge while she held my stuff...
hi I'm Emily and I thoroughly enjoy getting minors hammered.. I'll start my AA intro just like that.
his ex girlfriend sent him a pic of her naked in the bathtub so I sent her a pic of me sucking his dick
Are you telling me right now that the weed man sexted you?
THE WEED MAN SEXTED ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
It’s gonna be hard being interviewed by this girl without remembering the time she showed me her nipple piercings at Dylan’s party
you thought the best thing to say to him was "you aint no fuckin cop"
Accidentally mixed my gin with cold brew coffee instead of cranberry juice. It’s bad. But I’ll finish it. Never leave a fallen soldier.
Randomize