Needless to say, wine tasting turned into wine chugging
There are babies in the room i shouldnt be high with babies in the room.
He kept saying 'your mouth is Amazing' even after I was on his dick.
all of his pictures were taken on a library computer, how did you even consider fucking him?
Just sit in your kitchen floor until something speaks to you.
Well Im currently dressed up as batman raiding frat houses for booze
He stripped down to boxers and then started flinging jello shots with a spoon into people's mouths like a catapult.
i decided this morning while eating my breakfast of red bull and cold pizza that i should take a vow of celibacy
This girl invited us back on the promise of weed and strudel...she delivered neither.
I've just been thinking about sangria a lot lately, like an adult.
Just walked past the field playing Jesus music with a fanny pack full of condoms and beer. Happy Sunday.
Was just told that I slept on the counter using a loaf of bread as a pillow. Clearly my life is going well.
Accidentally made a straight guy question his sexuality again. I really gotta watch myself.
She threw my purse across the room almost broke a lamp and this all started bc she forgot what an air mattress was
Gonna do a few lines then clean my room so I can feel like my life is somewhat in order.
Randomize