College reaches a new low. We just carved a shot glass out of a potatoe.
So I don't have any furniture but we just skateboard drunk around the floor.
nothing says platonic group sex like a campfire and smores
I wish i could tell a story about guys I know without the phrase "and then I blew him." coming up.
im in Michaels with rachel and i see a little boy jumping around and waving a rainbow pompom. Welcome to our team little one
You'll be the guy with the raft that sells burritos on the river. You'd be legendary.
You were throwing ham at people telling them you were the sandwhich fairy
It's either my own vomit or popcorn butter in my ear right now. Banking on the second one.
We made popcorn last night. So it's both
And by "schedule" I meant crumbled up liquor store receipt, that I wrote shit on.
I did way too many drugs this past week for having a broken nose #commitment
This hangover is what we deserve after that level of debauchery.
I'm trying to get weird tonight. Like I want to see bitches crawling on all fours drinking milk from bowls and shit by 5 am. You down?
You need to get out of there before he falls in love with you.
I'm with the cops, Trish's gay husband stabbed himself and is framing her for attempt of murder and I'm dressed 4 the club I'm wearing leather pants leather jacket leather boots and black club top. Embarrassed
There are leaves in my underwear?
Randomize
