i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
He took me to the bathroom in the gay bar to "just cuddle." Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice...well...
Given my current decline of critical thinking and capacity for speech it's probably best u call the cops
Hey can we break in your window? We need to borrow the dog.
When we were done making out, some guy ran into the room yelling, "I'll save you Brandon! I'll save you!"
Well my ankle is fucked up, everytime it pops I have a reminder of $200. Jager bomb night and the day we began to rebuild our friendship.
Whenever you get off. By "pick me up from work" I mean, "pick me up from a bar by work at your earliest convenience" :)
I'm so drunk. Liken realign drink
Like really drunk?
Or did you enjoy repositioning your drink?
Turns out Edward 40 hands and life-sized jenga is really hard...Didn't stop you from trying. How is your concussion?
Reasons I shouldn't drink... My twitter drafts keep getting more and more emotional.
I told the American that we should start banging in Canada incase I get hurt and have to go to the hospital.. is that rude to say?
I AM EATING BACON AND CHEESE. FUCK THE BULLSHIT.
I was trying to drink every time they said planned parenthood but my body isn't cut out for this.
Where am I? And why the fuck did you leave me here?
Relax. I left you somewhere safe plus you have all my weed so you know I will come back for you.
We get up to three toppings. Dignity is not one of them.
Randomize
