dude she wont stop talking about little people big world...she said my penis looked like zach roloff and took a picture with her phone?
how the fuck did you end up in georgia? you were here at my party dry humping some chick 2 hours ago
so you mean to tell me that there is no way you can get me?
sounds like you fell off the wagon.
fuck falling off. at this point, the wagon is a dot on the horizon.
whatever. i don't care. i just want to be drunk wrapped in an american flag.
We were just at different life stages. He wanted to get married and have kids, I wanted to take MDMA and fuck my roommate.
That gas station is used for only two things, picking up moonshine and getting murdered. Only two outcomes.
The trees feel like magic. Come fly to taco bell with me.
I need a burrito and a hug.
I won't trust your judgement until the word stripper doesn't make me laugh
So your brother is gay after all... Just caught him making out with my brother... Apparently he's gay too
Negotiating with my body. We're ok. Violent upheaval is not necessary.
I just showed this kid my nipples to work my shift tmw
Anyone who does not consider cereal and wine as a balanced breakfast needs to leave immediately.
How did people get blow jobs before text messaging?
I was simply suggesting that you really should try coke bondage sex.
Randomize
