I've never had a man I enjoyed more than steak
Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
Just cleaned up my puke with my lecture notes.
I woke up on a futon with 2 stolen budwiesers in my purse, 5 extra bucks, a sucker stuck to my shoe, one sock, and a stolen copy of the zombie survival guide
please tell me this is not legit
scarred for life. way too high and witnessed some chick give a dude head on the dance floor
drunk. just smoked a spliff with a 19yr old hungarian bike taxi driver and bonded over the difficulties of getting weed in a different country. idk y shit like this isnt in the study abroad info packets
I accidentally got a lemon stuck in your bong. I was trying to make it taste good. Sorry
Only you could walk of shame to a childrens pirate themed birthday party
got one for peeing in public....called the cop a donut dunking communist...should be a fun court appearance
The worst part about living in a small town is partying with your pharmacist and then having to buy Plan B from him the next morning.
I refuse to answer that question on the grounds that it may incriminate me
Did you really think putting a napkin over your head would make you giving him a bj less obvious?
You think you can just send me a picture of your dick and everything will be ok?
Yep.
Once my new license was put into my hand, a light from the heavens shined down and pauly D's voice was in my mind saying ohh yeaaah 21 yeaaah
Randomize
