hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
I woke up at 7am naked in my bathtub with the shower running. My apartment was so full of steam that my ceiling was dripping. Who thought it would be okay for me to get my own place, anyway?
Why are there hot girls at the dollar store?
The recession has changed everything man.
At least you didnt end up topless in a Tina Turner wig singing cabaret tunes
im probably the most hungover person watchin icarly right now
Must be January. Theres a fat chick on an elliptical wearing khaki capris. Someone doesnt own any workout clothes
so many types of cookies right now. i'm eating four kinds of cookies that i've made into larger cookie sandwiches. too high. whoa.
By the way, she says hi. At least I think she did since she licked my phone
Wedding cake is always the best dance partner. In the corner. With a jack and coke. And while I'm crying. Listening to "Almost Paradise".
I have a broken liver
I see that the whole "let's take a break from drinking" has worked out really well for us.
I mean like, my liver will beg my brain for mercy. Brainll be like I'm Greg Jennings. Liverll be like I'm Darren Sharper. Brainll be like hold my diiiiick.
Her only article of clothing is an American Flag
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
I'm gonna play eenie meenie at the bar tonight because it's women's day and I deserve the dick
you were on a whole other level. you went home with him because he said "you got some light ass eyes"
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