actually, I'm a sock model
My gyno told me the birth control she prescribed reduces sex drive
wats the point then?
We couldn't even have sex we were both laughing so hard. I don't know how I feel about the quality of that weed.
He asked me If i had cheated on my boyfriend when I said no he said it's like he doesnt know me anymore
I cant believe you went home with her.. Your poor immune system and the shit you put it through.
I mean, I can get to know him eventually. The time frame doesn't really matter. I'll have sex with him regardless of whether he's interesting or not.
The stoned girl at the dining hall just handed me a single chicken wing and insisted that she's "unable to procure more rations"
My vagina is trying to run away to Boston without me.
Also I fell in love w a girl dressed as a pirate that was great at doing the limbo
Bang-toberfest begins!!
Should probably stop going into the gas station to look for the most normal person to hitch a ride with to drive me to a party
Why was I lying under a truck last night?
I'm waiting for your stupid pizza and this 400 lb drunk man is behind me singing the acapella version of Elevation by U2
You know you gave a quality blow job when you have to ice your neck and jaw the next day.
That was fun and all, but let's never have sex on a ladder ever again.
Randomize
