We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
I just spent the last hour spooning with my drug dealer.
you'd be alarmed at how much plan b i just found in mom's bathroom...
He gave me the "I've pictured you while jerkin off" look
What happened to "I wouldnt even touch her with a ten foot pole"?
Her vagina devoured it.
Some guy stole lobsters by hiding them in his pants. We should strive to be like him.
You were so drunk last night you left the bar to go buy a razor so you could go home with him
I turned around and there were three 10 year old kids running around with sparklers. Weirdest college part ever.
Welcome to Philly.
Maybe next year when I'm 30 I will be over puking at lunch on Fridays. Maybe
High-fiving last weekend's hook up in passing on the way to class has given me quite the lady boner.
I told my manager I was trying to conserve my energy for date night/Sexual Olympics later. That's legit for another break, right?
He somehow always manages to get me naked within 5 minutes of being together. It's like fucking witchcraft.
Is there evidence of another human being getting away with this/ not dying?
I'll pick u up. I have to buy a new sofa cover anyway. I swear I've never seem a girl cum like that before.
You passed out in my backseat like a legitimate infant. A really drunk, really horny infant
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