living well may be the best revenge, but it doesn't hurt that my exhusband is now dating a BEAST.
I am at a bar watching a rat tail get braided.
is there an easy way to say "i didnt plan on sleeping with you until i saw how drunk you were" ?
You should come over. I am making a celebratory I got laid by a huge penis cake.
Nobody is wearing shirts anymore. What is happening.
so the party was at my house but some how i ended up being the only one who slept outside
We were just talking bout putting on helmets and going fo a car ride just to see how ppl react. I will def fit in here haha
Don't forget: you only show your tits for the good beads. Be judicious.
It's all good. Going back to my room to try and air out my balls.
WE'RE FINALLY ADMITTING THAT WE DESPERATELY WANT TO SCREW EACH OTHER. THIS IS WHAT PROGRESS FEELS
dude, we need a reunion soon, my vagina needs a deep massage. The kitty is ready to play
i just got banned from the m&m's website for trying to get poon slayer written on my custom order
I WOULD SERIOUSLY RECOMMEND THE SHIT THAT I AM ON RIGHT NOW
THERE'S MORE TO LIFE THAN JUST MISSIONARY
You're going to literally shit your fucking unholy pants when Jesus rides in with his dual light-sabers on his velociraptor and cleaves you in half.
Randomize
