people from other dorms came to marvel at the dump i took. i had a bio major take a picture.
You and I should start a club for people who woke up on outside on a bench with no idea how they got there.
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
The cop only confirmed I'm .22% Irish. Then I threw up on him.
somehow we got the entire party to start singing "ill make a man out of you" from mulan. needless to say, that kid had the best keg stand i'd ever seen.
THERE ARE ENTIRELY TOO MANY HOT UNDERAGE GIRLS HERE FOR THIS TO REMAIN LEGAL.
It's ok for me to have his baby but I can't be his friend on fb. Wth is wrong with this
I won't go into too much detail about this but you should probably wash your sheets. In bleach. Or just burn them. Thanks for letting me sleep in your bed bro. Enjoy scotland.
Gina was bawling her eyes out and then she ran into the street and peed. she kept screaming "LOOK WHAT YOUVE DONE TO ME"
That's why we don't trade sex for Taco Bell. It's called the dollar menu.
Do you think you could handle being our babysitter if we roofied ourselves for fun??
What happened to my face?
You kneed yourself in the eye during the Harlem Shake.
It was impressive.
Buffalo PD walked in my bedroom this morning at 7 am. Was still blackout drunk, fully dressed, Steak Out wrapper on the floor, parking meter on the floor of the bar room. 'Both of your doors were wide open, wanted to make sure no one was robbing you.' Then I made a pass at her.
His flight was delayed by two hours though. I just got cock-blocked by clouds :(
THE SUN DOESNT SET TIL 647 YAAAAASSSSSSSSSS. Goodbye seasonal depression hello regular depression
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