TAKE DOWN THAT PHOTO OF ME IN THE NURSES COSTUME NOW.
I wish they had a "No Yankees" filter on status updates.
My goal for this summer is to make enough extra money to be able to afford the ticket for water skiing naked.
I have to have sex with him again. I feel like I need to train him so no other girl experiences that bad of sex.
We made it a contest to fuck on everything in your room while you were on vacation.
Literally I thought my ears were pouring out blood. That high.
I threw up sweet potatoes. Worst thing to throw up ever. They came back mashed.
Lube is flammable
Who is this??
Sad Megan is Sad
Have you been drinking my beer?
She's going to jail in a few weeks but she just got a boyfriend. Yet I'm still single as fuck.
I think he fucked my hip out of place.
I can't believe I'm going to buy bitcoin to pay for erection pills
i can't believe i helped you shave your back last night, and she still didn't sleep with you.
I swear I'm going to walk in one day with you in a ballgag just masturbating feverishly
Well i can't stand the sound of my own crying
I’m tired of his bullshit and premature ejaculation. I’m going to hotel bars and finding a guy who is DTF
Randomize