a smallpox vaccine scar is like a lower back tattoo.
I just saw a girl make a shank with the underwire in her bra...
I mean i might have to drop this class tomorrow. I just walked into a midterm
margarita wednesday is really going to dip into new year's eve thursday
He sent me a pic of his Junk. He said it was a Brett Farve valentine.
Nothing is more awkward than taking a dump while someone is crying in the bathroom.
I just did the math. It is, in fact, cheaper to go out drinking every weekend than it would be for me to pay for a legitimate therapist. What are you doing next Friday night?
Great way to live...just blowing loads on upholstery
I wish I'd realized he looked like Skrillex before I was already in the middle of fucking him...
Are you doing that thing where you're convinced I made a terrible decision
Daily.
Literally just napped at strip club. Don't know how long
Omg the world wants us to be better people
I refuse
So, anyways, aside from wanting to seduce my roommate for booze, how's everything been
He left cushions on my floor, chocolate on my bra and unexplained scratches on my thighs. I think this one might get a second date.
dude idk where I am. fuckin like. there wheat field and a horizon and shit. I think I got on a bus? some dude named Sam gave me a pamphlet about Jesus.
Randomize
